I Love "I Love My Cotton Candy Hair!"

This blog is dedicated to the wonderfully talented Nicole Updegraff.

If you've spoken to me in the last six months you know that my very close friend of fourteen years wrote, illustrated, and published her very first book, entitled "I Love My Cotton Candy Hair." I am so proud of her, but what's more, the topic of her book has hit home with me for years.

I've never really given much thought to my hair. It's always been there, on the top of my head. My lifestyle does not allow for a lot of fussing with my hair. I run or swim, and sometimes both, on a daily basis. Excessive time spent on my crowning glory just never made sense. I'll either swim or sweat it out within days. That's not to say I don't like my hair, I do. I've always found it to be very resiliant, considering that "black girls aren't supposed to wash their hair everyday," and I do. Sure it gets nappy, but so what? Isn't it supposed to? Why do we care anymore?

I realized that even though yes, I relax my hair, it's not because I don't like it the way it is, it's because it has become easier at this stage in my life. I've always left the roots a little nappy, because I too enjoy the "cotton candy" feel against my scalp.

My son Jackson has great hair! I love the tight little curls that look like a peppercorn, but when unraveled are like three inches long! I don't take him to a barber, and I rarely cut it off. I like it, and so does he. This week, I was at my parents house for dinner and decided that Jackson could use a trim around the hairline, the boy looks like teen wolf if I don't stay on it. I thought I was pretty clear in what I wanted my dad to do, until I heard a soft voice say "my hair!" Of course my dad was over there shearing my poor boy like a sheep while my mother looked on encouragingly!

When I asked my dad what he was doing he feigned ignorance. "I thought you wanted me to give him a haircut?!" I tried for at least five minutes to explain to them, that no, I did not want Jackson to have a hair cut, but a trim around the hairline. I enjoy the natural texture of his hair and don't see any reason why it should be shaved off! "Well what about the rest of it?" they asked. Now I was confused. Why do we have to cut the rest of it? What is wrong with a little black boy having a little hair on his head? Does it have to be the texture of Jayden Smith's in order to be acceptable?

They were dead serious. "Are you growing an Afro?" they asked, "cause if you are then you have to pick those curls out!" Really? Because I didn't get that memo? My mom even became a little beligerent, asking me to provide internet images so she could comprehend just exactly what this boy's hair will look like. I tried to describe as best as I could, and for the life of me could not understand why this debate was even taking place.

I know that little girls face constant scrutiny of their hair, but I was surprised to face so much of it raising a little boy. I want my son to love himself for who he is as well. I want him to be able to wear his hair however he wants without being ridiculed, without being excluded from employment, and without having to explain why he has chosen to let it be just as God intended.

So kudos to Nicole for addressing such a serious topic in such a creative and artistic way. She soon will be raising her own little boy and I can not wait to hear about how her experiences differ between girls and boys. I am most excited that the first book will not be the last, it is merely the first in a series! Perhaps we will have the pleasure of seeing one geared toward little boys some day soon. Hint Hint Nicole!

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Please get your copy of her fabulous book and tell a friend.

http://www.amazon.com/cotton-candy-named-charlie-presents/dp/0578029499/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&Ss+books&qid=1254700570&sr=8-1